I am really starting to feel like I’m the only person on the planet who hasn’t watched “Game of Thrones.” Am I it? Anyone else feeling this way? Anyone else feeling left out in the cold because you haven’t spent the last however many years watching every episode and waxing poetically about its fight scenes and killer dragons. Do you find that people are constantly coming up to you and saying, “Dude! What do you mean you don’t watch ‘Thrones?!?’ Are you like on some religious fast or something?”
In fact, scientists at the Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence (SETI) have just announced that they received a signal from outer space with a message that read, “Did Daerneys really go and [SPOILER ALERT] last week? Because that was REALLY messed up, man. We’re freakin’ out here!”
I have absolutely no idea what they’re talking about. Want to talk Avengers? I got you covered. Need to discuss the arc of the next “Star Wars,” and I’m all over it. Got some theories about “The Lego Movie.” OK, I’m not totally following, but I’ll give it a whirl.
But “Game of Thrones?” I have absolutely no clue. I’ve never watched more than a handful of scenes, and the only reason I know any character’s name is because people constantly get in my face and say: “Dude, what do you mean you don’t know who ‘Cersei’ is?” … and then ask if I’m on a religious fast.
All around me it’s Thrones, Thrones, Thrones. I was in a meeting the other day when someone out of the blue said: “It’s like the saying on ‘Game of Thrones’: ‘That’s what I do. I drink and I know things.’”
I thought to myself, “What the heck does that even mean?!? Are we about to start fighting with swords or something?” Everyone else started nodding in agreement with this person, and one person even said, “Ah … Tyrion Lannister!”
And into a “Game of Thrones” rabbit hole we fell.
People talk about being partially fluent in Dothraki (forget that they can hardly spell in English.) They want to go out and adopt direwolves (to my knowledge, they don’t even exist.) And they wax philosophically and use show references in the most absurd occasions: “So, your analysis of the third quarter financials reminds me of the Battle of Winterfell when the Night King …”
It’s a show, people!
Even my news feeds are filled with obscure “Game of Thrones” stories that only a super-fan would care about, like this one: “No Way – The Names of the Stark Direwolves Totally Foreshadowed Where They’d All End Up.”
The craziest thing: I clicked on the story and read it!
Now that the series is over and all the hoopla is starting to die down, I fear I’ll be just curious enough to start watching. To see what it’s all about and give it a shot. Knowing me, I’ll probably get hooked. Pulled into the “Game of Thrones” vortex now that the series is over. Finally able to pepper meetings with references from the show … only to be told, “Dude, that is so second season. What have you been on some religious fast or something?”